Now That's Odd

 Photo: http://www.sitcomsonline.com/photopost/showphoto.php/photo/134011/cat/779

I was reading a friend's blog just now and for no apparent reason while I was reading their blog, I recalled the smell of horse breath. It's not a smell that puts me off, rather, it's a smell that has excitement associated with it. When I've smelled it in the past, it meant that I was about to get on a horse and ride. The last horse I rode was in a snow covered woods in the Poconos sometime in the late 80's. The last time I was around a horse and actually touched it was a few years ago in North Carolina.

How to connect that recollection with my experiences shared in this blog, may seem to be a bit of a stretch. Not really. It's not as obvious as "You need to get back on the horse again, Greg," or anything like that. I think it's about knowing there is excitement ahead. What that excitement is, I have no clue.

It hasn't been all  blissful days since the diagnosis, treatment and receiving the "all clear." It wouldn't be even if there hadn't been a life changing event in my recent history. However, I think that once you get the all clear, there can be an assumption that all is well and will be well after you come out the other side. Not true.

I've shared some of my challenges with folks in person and I don't feel like posting them here. I will tell you, the challenges have been unique, sometimes frightening, but never, I say never, have I felt like they can't be overcome. Once you've been through the biggest challenge you will ever have to face, your perspective on lesser challenges changes.

What if I have to face an even larger challenge later on? I have no clue how I'll react. That includes the decision I would have to make if there was a relapse, or another form of cancer that develops from the result of having the treatments I had.

That will be my decision to make. I may approach others for their input, but I will have the final say on the matter. I may make a mistake in doing so.

None of what I share with you is with the intent of bracing you for some pending medical news. I have been open with my diagnosis, treatments, etc. to now and will remain so. There are people in this world with whom I will not share details if they are not smart enough to find or haven't been directed to this blog.

Nope, what this post about is purging some anxiety that has been building. I will tell you that a huge part of that anxiety will be gone today. Those who have spoken directly to me know of what I speak. If you don't know me personally, trust me, it's not that important and it's not cancer related, even though it is a cancer of sorts.

Giddyup